Oil in My Lamp

My last word of testimony may not seem earth shaking to you but it has had all the effects that an earthquake would have for me.
I grew up on songs like , give me oil in my lamp keep me burning , burning , burning, give me oil in my lamp I pray.
What an odd way to sing about the parable of the 10 virgins. I see it all so differently now.
As I shared with you last time I have come to realize that the oil one needs to have in their lamp is "a right spirit." This right spirit can be lost , just as the five foolish virgins discover.
I think David had lost his right spirit unawares. Fortunately for him the LORD sent Nathan the prophet to prompt him into seeing where he really was. In Psalms 51 he asks the LORD to renew a right spirit within him.
I have been meditating on how to have more of an indication that I might be losing a right spirit. What warning signs can I see to make me more cautious and instead of completely losing my right spirit start doing what would motivate God to renew my right spirit.
Once again I have been reminded how important it is to God that I believe that He loves me.
You know that was the difference between David and Saul . David was convinced that God loved him and Saul just never was sure. Saul was very works oriented I think. It wasn't an obedience based on a confidence of God's love that I see in Saul . I see him trying to earn God's love and always testing God to see if God would love him now.
My transformation of becoming a new creation in Christ Jesus has made me see that I have got to leave my old Saul like attitudes behind.
God loves me and that is settled. He chastens those whom He loves. Only to point them towards repentance. He is glad that I start asking for a gift of repentance and start seeking for Him to answer my request for bread at the door.
So having a full lamp that doesn't drain out through a hole is one that is buoyed by the confidence that God loves me. Foolish virgins may want me to convince them that God loves them but that may be the way one could lose their oil.
I use to think that the reason God wanted me to do things like feed and cloth my enemies, chase down the thief who stole my coat and give him my cloak, and other such things was so others would be convinced by my actions that God loves them.
I had that all wrong. My life is kind of like a dance , that I do with only one partner. He leads me to feed the hungry and he leads me to pray for the sick much like a dance partner leads one in a waltz with fancy steps. I am just following. He is leading. That is all that it is about. He is my God. I am His person . We do things together. I make mistakes , He gives me a nudge to correct my mis-steps. He never stops loving me, He never stops leading me. He is God.