Oh Happy Day , When Jesus Washed My Sins Away , Oh Happy Day

Do you remember that day ? I mean the day that you "realized" that Jesus had washed your sins away.

I think that day is the day the "Joy of my Salvation" began. My quest has been to rejoice in the LORD alway , making it imperative that I remember that "day."

Actually for me I had several of "that day." I grew up believing that I had done something so horribly bad that no one would forgive me. The reason for this action ( I believed) was that I had a reprobate mind.

When God first revealed to me that I had believed a lie and that He would forgive me , I had a "happy day" for a few minutes. Peoples opinion was louder than God's and once again I became convinced that , I had done something so horribly bad , that no one would forgive me.

This light on , then light off , happened over and over in my life.
A friend came back into my life recently and she remembered me when , "the light was on".
She remembered how happy I was even though I had dire , dire circumstances. So it has kick started my memories.

I remember my "happy day" now. I remember how the Holy Spirit brought to my thoughts "who soever will may come." My thought was , "but what about the reprobate?" What made the light come on was this thought , " that a reprobate would not even want to come to God. "

That light lasted quite a while but it became dimmed once again by man's opinion. I have come to think of all of those times when "man's opinion" took charge of my emotions as trips to Doubting Castle, as in Pilgrim's Progress written by John Bunyan.

Once again I am leaving Doubting Castle, this time to believe that I can rejoice in the LORD alway and again I say, Rejoice. This time I have determined in my heart not to listen to opinions of others. Also I want to be a friend to others who have had a really rough time of it.

Better than giving them promises from God's word would be my belief in their "happy day."

That there actually was a day, that Jesus washed their sins away.

What Is The Coolest Thing God Has Done For You Today?

This was the question Francis Chan suggested his congregation ask each other. He was teaching on joy and pointed out that we are actually given this command in the Bible , "Rejoice, in the LORD alway. And again I say , rejoice." Phil 4:4

So many times when I give a word of testimony I share what I have to rejoice in. When I feel that the Holy Spirit has given me a scripture that I am to apply my life to, I rejoice in the moment . There is joy in the Holy Ghost . But so many times while I am so busy trying to live my life in light of this Word , that joy fades.

What is it that happens exactly ?

I begin to worry that I am not going to " pull it off " . You know , I begin to think , " wow, this is so important , I really need to do this, maybe I won't do this, and then , oh, look here I am not doing it. " Before I know it , I have no joy. I have no sense of God's power being with me.

Living my life expecting the Holy Spirit to enlighten my path with the word of God is a very joyful existence. Letting how well I am doing at walking in that light to be my plumb line for joy , explains exactly why my joy fades in and out.

In while the Holy Spirit brings me the word out while I try to walk in it.

Ah , but can I lose my joy if I "Rejoice in the LORD, alway. And again I say, rejoice ?"

Here is the catch. It will have to be the only thing I do. I can not be divided and say, "Well, if I seem to be walking in the word good, I will have joy in that. " No , you see that would not be rejoicing in the LORD.

I will have to determine to rejoice in the LORD , always. In the LORD .

Would you like to know about some really cool things God has done for me lately ?

My daughter has been given a promotion at work. Instead of having an unpredictable time schedule each week she will have the same eight hour shift each week and after a year a paid vacation.

A cool thing for me was when I realised that this ominous burden I put myself under to be able to love unlovable people would no longer need to be my problem. I have given that problem to God and I now trust that He will produce His love in me . So you 20 people out there that I have been praying for , my hope is that the love I have asked God to put in me for you will be evident the next time I see you.

Another cool thing God did for me and my daughter. Last night I was just kind of out of it. Not thinking I left a package of chocolate chip cookies on the table and when I came home I found that my daughter's Spaniel had eaten them all. When we looked on the Internet to see just how bad chocolate is for dogs it did not look good. We prayed and asked God to spare her the ill effects that chocolate usually have on dogs. She never did get sick. She is alive and well today. I think it is a cool thing that God did for us.

These cool things that He did I hope you find interesting. These events are not what I am rejoicing in though.

My word of testimony today is : Phil 4:4 Rejoice in the Lord alway: [and] again I say, Rejoice.

Grace

How far ? How intimate ? How deep do I want to go with Jesus today ?

If only I would stay within the realm of " Grace Received ".

Grace like forgiveness is limitless . My ability to receive grace places for me boundaries. Now these borders can be enlarged but the attempt to do so must be guided by the Holy Spirit.

When someone councils me that "this is what Jesus would do, " the ability to do so can come no other way than but the grace of God.

I have found the council much more helpful if the individual has in fact received this grace to do as he/she suggests. Somehow hope , or maybe it is faith , perhaps it is love , floats over to me when a person who has received grace shares his/her testimony.

Grace received , reveals power being perfected in a weakness.

Lately I have found many things to not be thankful for. However, I would correct myself. " Be thankful for all things ", I would remind myself. As if I could prod myself on to do what is right without grace.

A new day and a fresh start , walking in "Grace Received " I purpose first of all to refresh my memory of the grace received to even want to be thankful for all things. My gift of grace to be glad for all things probably began when I would quote Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose.

Knowing all things work together for good helps promote thoughts that promotes thankfulness. This has come from a grace given to me when I had a huge weakness of murmuring and complaining . The mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ is so rich that He will continue to grant me this grace even now. I know from experience that He will perfect His power within my weakness and I will be able to thank Him for all things , once again.

It is kind of like muscle building. When a person starts lifting weights they do not start with the 100 lb. on the bar. They start with what they can lift easily at first and then gradually put more weight on.

Because of my circumstances I see that I need to graduate up to a higher weight level. However , if I forget how I ever managed to lift the weights I have already , there will be no way that I increase my ability to be thankful for even more dire circumstances.

I praise God for the grace to desire to be thankful for all things.

Entering His Sanctuary

2 Chron 30:8 Now be ye not stiffnecked, as your fathers [were, but] yield yourselves unto the LORD, and enter into his sanctuary, which he hath sanctified for ever: and serve the LORD your God, that the fierceness of his wrath may turn away from you.

Eze 44:9 Thus saith the Lord GOD; No stranger, uncircumcised in heart, nor uncircumcised in flesh, shall enter into my sanctuary, of any stranger that [is] among the children of Israel.


Eze 44: 16 They shall enter into my sanctuary, and they shall come near to my table, to minister unto me, and they shall keep my charge.

Just because you see a problem does not mean that it is something that you are to address right now. In fact I think it might be wise to spend time in His Sanctuary .
In Psalms 78 David is increasingly aware of the enemies achievements and he becomes oppressed just thinking about it.
Looking at someone else's life can only bring me down because I have taken my eyes off of Jesus.

I am praying that He will help me once again to get my eyes on Him.
He is the One I want to follow. He is the One that really matters to me. I just want to go where He goes.

Sometimes it appears He wants me to take an educated guess as to where He's going. Educated by His word I stepped out. Now I am really sorry that I did so unwisely. I am not sorry that the whole experience has developed a better ear within me. I hear better now.

So what do I hear about my current situation?

That David was able to sing , my soul is free as a bird out of the snare of the fouler.
It will not be long before I too can sing and dance before the LORD . He is a faithful deliverer and rescues those who call upon His name.

Lazarus

Romans 8:2 For the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you through Christ Jesus from the power of sin that leads to death.



I believe Jesus when He said, "Be of good cheer, for I have overcome the world." I believe that while He ministered on the earth for 3 1/2 years He was showing me how to overcome. Jesus having a life-giving Spirit in Him is a far easier concept to believe than I having a life-giving Spirit in me. Easy to believe or not easy to believe is meant only to imply that to believe may take strength. I do believe but living like I believe takes a strength only God can give me. The truth is that He did give me that life-giving Spirit .



While Jesus ministered to the earth as the Son of man , people had not as yet been given this life-giving Spirit to dwell in them.



I believe that Jesus wanted me to be able to believe and receive "ALL" that He did for me. When He spoke life into Lazarus He was saying (with His actions , I believe), that He could give that same life giving experience to me.



Romans 8:6 If your sinful nature controls your mind, there is death. But if the Holy Spirit controls your mind, there is life and peace.



I can choose to look at the way my mind thinks when caught following the flesh and believe it is dead. I can say to myself, "Look how it always goes back to thinking like my parents thought. Look how it is so easily deceived into thinking like some charismatic person is thinking. Look how my thinking stinks! "



Or I can choose to believe that Jesus can arrive on the scene at any moment He chooses and breath life into my stinking mind. He can bring it alive with the power of His life-giving Spirit that He gave me.



Romans 8:9-10 But you are not controlled by your sinful nature. You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you. ( And remember that those who do not have the Spirit of Christ living in them are not Christians at all.) Since Christ lives within you, even though your body will die because of sin, your spirit is alive because you have been made right with God.



That means I have a right spirit .



When Lazarus came alive he still needed a little help from his friends. Jesus told them to take his grave clothes off him .



It took some really brave people to stay around while Jesus performed this miracle. I do not want to smell a dead rat. That is a small smell though compared to a dead dog , or cow. These people were surely use to coming upon a dead something when they traveled from town to town. There were no animal control people to call back then and say, "please come get this dead deer that died on the path from my town to my friend's town."



Yet Lazarus' friends were there when Jesus said, "take the grave clothes off him." I think not only Jesus loved Lazarus but his sisters and friends loved him too. Friends that hang around and expect Jesus to do something miraculous in your life are priceless. Friends who believe that Jesus is still doing miracles today are the kind of friends I need.



I also want to be a friend to those who are believing that Christ lives within them. When they say, "I sin." I want to encourage them like Jesus has encouraged me. "Be of good cheer, "He said, "For I have overcome the world."

He Loves Me Where I 'm At

When the Holy Spirit convicts me of sin , this is a good thing. The conviction can stay a good thing until I decide He is not working fast enough. That I should be helping more with my repentance and then , I look around and wonder where the Holy Spirit is !
The only way that I know to back up is, to once again go to that place in my spirit that the Holy Spirit met me.
Like the woman at the well that Jesus met. He was not condemning her for where she was at , and I do believe that no matter what our sins, so it is with Jesus today.
He is not condemning me. Does He want me to change ? Yes, a spiritual change that He has done. Not a fleshly work that I can do.
And so , for it not to be a work of the flesh , I must wait on the Holy Spirit and believe I am loved, right where I am at.

A Good Kind of Hiding

Most of my life I have felt like hiding. Hiding from God's love is not an option however when you plan to enter the kingdom of God. Here you have to not hide and so I have endeavored to quit hiding from His love.
It has not been easy , it has taken days and days of applying His word to my life. Basically what the rest of the body of Christ is doing. I know , I am not so different.
For me the true word of testimony is when I can share that process with others. Very few talk about the housecleaning job that they take the time to purposely thank the LORD for each chair as they dust the legs and seats. Oh, I am sure there are a lot of people doing this, just not a lot take the time to talk about it. How I can thankfully dust that chair is a word of testimony to me because I know that except for the awesome power of the grace of God I could not dust it. I could not want to get down on the floor and dust the legs and braces that probably no one will notice if I don't do it.
It is from this grace that I spring board toward other things that my flesh does not want to do.

I do not want to come out from hiding. It has been a plan of self preservation for so long I can not even remember why I started hiding in the first place. Lately I have been having a very hard time with my flesh , that wants to keep on hiding. Finally I found a break through.
My flesh doesn't really want to keep hiding however ........it only wants to come out when it is sure that it is safe.

I can not imagine how one could go about convincing ones self that life will be safe.
It is not safe. To come out from hiding is definitely a risk .
There is one way that I can come out from hiding in this world and still feel safe. That would be to realize that there is a safe place for me in Jesus.

Jesus said, "that in this world there would be trouble , but be of cheer for He had overcome the world. "

Stepping out of hiding from my own self preservation but walking into a world that Jesus will be with me , makes coming out a whole lot easier.

He That Ears Let Him Hear

My friend and I are hoping for an encounter with God. This means we are open to anything or any way that He might want to reveal Himself to us.
I shared a word of testimony yesterday with my friend. It was of a time when God moved on my behalf in a very wonderful way. My reason for sharing that testimony was because I also wanted her to know what happened the next day.
Some well meaning church attender called me up and said that I had been unwise . That God wants us to use wisdom and that my step of faith could of cost many people their lives.
My friend was shocked. "You did not believe her, did you?" my friend said. That is what I wanted to tell you, "yes , I did."
I was at a time in my life when I thought everyone knew better than me. I loved God but I thought when He said to love people , He meant "please people." I could not fathom doing anything that other church goers thought I should not do.
Now of course , I know better. Just in case I forget , I recently have had my own little reminder, that every time God moves , somebody is going to feel it their duty to shame you.

I told her that I think the way to handle these helpers words is to throw them in the fire. Just like Paul threw that viper in the fire. I was also quick to remind her that Jesus said, " when you feed your enemies and you cloth your enemies it will be like fire of coals upon their heads. "

My enemies seem to be well fed and they have nicer clothes than I do. However, I am praying that the spiritual food and the white wedding garments they really hope to be wearing when Jesus returns , will be provided.

May God be glorified as I need His strength to do this. Throwing their words into the fire and blessing those who curse you is not an easy thing to do. Actually more than I can do. May God be glorified as each day I am trying to be more yielded to His strength and ask again for an encounter of Himself into my life.

Pressing In To Suffering

I woke up last night with my leg really hurting. I have been having leg cramps during the night pretty often but nothing like this.
Always before I would take my foot, the one on the end of the leg that was hurting , and I would press my foot to the futon end bar. Actually I had started sleeping on the futon because of the two round bars that serve as arm rests when folded up for sitting , and head and ends for a bed when laid down. A doctor had once told a friend of mine that if she would fix herself up a brace to press her foot against at night when the leg cramps started that they would then subside.
This had been working pretty good for me , after about 5 minutes of foot pressing the cramps would subside and I could go back to sleep.
But last night was different. I woke to a greater degree of pain in my leg than I ever had before. I couldn't bring myself to press on the bar. I got up and took some aspirin then laid back down. After about 20 minutes the pain lessened to the dull cramp that I was use to in my leg. I would then press my foot for a while , for some reason I could not stick with it for 5 minutes . I would find myself waking up over and over with a leg cramp all during the night.
About 6 a.m. I woke still hurting , my first thought was what will my scripture for today be?
Groggily I thought, suffering. Something about suffering. As I laid there awake enough now to stick with a 5 minute foot press I quoted to myself Romans 5:3-5 Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. NIV
Somehow first thing in the morning my thoughts always seem clearer. I thought to myself now do I really think that Paul was talking about this kind of suffering ? Somehow , no , it did not seem likely to me. More likely he was talking about the kind of suffering one does when they know that they are not liked because of who or what they are. Yet as I have been learning lately I must press on, I must not react as though I am unloved. I must react as though I am loved. I must press on and believe that I can not be separated from God's love. That no matter what any one says to me or does that affects me I must press in and believe that there is no way that what they do that can interfere with what God has planned for me.
Since God is the bigger power here , no ones little attempts , or failed attempts to show love even , will mount to a hill of beans compared to God's love.
I am one of those people that hear , "bless your heart," a lot , or "aren't you sweet." Somehow it feels like some throwing marshmallows at me , instead of love. Of course , marshmallows really is nothing to complain about. If you are one of those people that you hear, "bless your heart ," a lot , you'll know what I mean.
But it is okay. Because God has got a pure sweet true , solid kind of love for me that I do not have to worry about if no one else can come up with. His is best , all I have to do is press in.

A Jezebel in A Martha's World

Yes, I am trying out a title for a new book.

Actually there is humor in knowing that very few people would be interested in a book with that title . Most of us know all to well how to act like a Jezebel and that is why the book titled Being a Mary in a Martha's World , sold really well.

I didn't buy that book though. I thought I had the Mary thing down pretty good and I didn't need it, until I realised that as a Mary one could oh so easily turn into a Jezebel.

Fortunately for me I had seen a few Jezebels in operation before and it wasn't hard for the Lord to hold a mirror up to my face and say, "Take a look."

If you read my previous post you know the Holy Spirit was convicting me about rebellion. I took all the steps towards repentance that I felt the Holy Spirit was showing me. The blessed fruit of that repentance is that the Holy Spirit is now able to show me how I was starting to act like a Jezebel.

Oh how thankful am I that the Holy Spirit does not let me go on and on with my own follies. What a relief to know that if you truly desire truth in the inward parts , you will get it.

I do not think the Jezebel spirit is strictly a woman thing although it seems to be most easily recognized in women , because of her gender. For those who have not seen Jezebels in operation before , it is a person who pretends submission to authority all the while working on their own agenda.

What is neat about the Holy Spirit is He started pricking me , (making me uncomfortable) when I knew my submission was not being real.
So that none of you out there are saying , "Oh wow, what a great person. She doesn't want to be fake." Let me inform you that is not really my doing.

I don't want to be fake because I want a real relationship with Jesus . How I got to be this way can only be attributed to the grace of God.

The word of my testimony today is that I am more able to forgive those people that I needed to forgive yesterday, and I am beginning to see a fruit of repentance.

Hallelujah, I am headed back to being a Mary in a Martha's world.

Not Worthy For You To Call Me Son

I've seen it in some churches for years. The truth is told on Sunday mornings and then somehow , some way , for the interested , they manage to apply that truth to their lives by the next Sunday. Only some times they stumble. Some times they are really wanting to apply God's word but they stumble. Can they holler , "Hey, wait up, I've stumbled !" ? Of course not. You are not suppose to stumble. What is wrong with you any way. So they come in to church next Sunday , disguising the bruises that happened when they fell , and hope that somewhere along the line they will be able to catch up. Some day.

The vision statement of my church is this , Jesus said it best in Matt. 12:20 A bruised reed shall he not break, and smoking flax shall he not quench, till he send forth judgment unto victory.

I sure hope that means you can holler ,"Hey, wait up, I've stumbled."

I think it does.

When Jesus told me to forgive my enemies He certainly was not commanding me to do something that He would not do Himself. In fact , because He did everything as the Father wanted Him to do, I know His Spirit now empowers me to do as He did.

My flesh really does not want to forgive my enemies. However, I am putting my confidence in God. I do not give the control of my life over to my flesh. I give it to God.

I am very thankful for another word of testimony given by a very famous lady, Corrie Ten Boone. She tells of a time when one of the prison guards who had treated her and her sister so badly , came to one of the meetings she was speaking in. He had become a Christian. Corrie Ten Boone knew that the thing her heavenly Father wanted her to do was forgive this man. She says in her testimony that in her mind she prayed , Jesus help me forgive him, and as she raised her hand to shake his , by the time their hands touched she sensed the power of the Holy Spirit helping her to forgive him.

It is testimonies like that that give me hope. My word of testimony is , " I am trying very hard to raise my hand."

Jesus said when we pray we are to say this to Our Father in Heaven, forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who have trespassed against us.

So I will. I thought today of myself being as the prodigal son. All stinky and ready to leave the pig sty. All I have to do is go home and be a servant, it will be better than it is for me now. Only I know He isn't going to let that happen. He wants me to be a son and I am going to have to do as a son. Am I going to let Him forgive me , when I do not want to forgive someone else who has done the same thing ?

I think when Paul wrote the just shall live by faith , he meant just that. I will raise my hand to shake the hand of my enemy in faith, believing that by the time it touches his , the work that Jesus Christ did for me on Calvary will manifest itself through my life.

For Those Who Are In Christ Jesus

Romans 8:1 [There is] therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

Just how do I become one of those people ? I would love to live in no condemnation. That would mean living in Christ Jesus , right ?

That would mean that I walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. This is the description I have of one who is in Christ Jesus.

My word of testimony today is that I , Diane Beadle am becoming one of those people.

The way that I have found to stay in this process of becoming , is to constantly , I mean as constantly as I can , believe that God the Father of my Lord Jesus Christ , loves me.

That means when I have a problem that makes me sure others probably would not like to be around me, I chose to believe that God loves me. I also chose to believe , that unless I am contagious , people do want to be around me. Maybe they want to want to be around me, I chose to believe if they know of God's love at all , they want to treat me as good as God would.

That means when any thing happens that my flesh wants to interpret as a sign that I am unloved, I must sustain myself with God's word and confess , that " Yes , He does love me."

John 3:16-18 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.

That means that every time my head hears thoughts that say the opposite of this truth I have to deal with it. I have to chose am I going to listen to the Spirit of Christ that dwells within me or am I going to listen to this liar? If my head is giving me thoughts that says , God does not love me, it has to be from some other source rather than the Spirit. The Spirit can not lie , He will only speak the truth , and the truth is God loves me. Any other thought is a lie.

Some people think the thing to do it just ignore the lie and go on the best you can.

I however believe that I am to take the sword of the Spirit and cut that lies head off.

I suppose you can do either and it will be fine. I just find that doing the latter has given me great joy in the Holy Ghost . It will take longer to do than the former and it may be more difficult and even seem to hurt while doing it.

Now that I have done it a few times I can not even remember why I thought the former way was an option. Only I knew I did , so I would never judge someone for doing so.

If you have read this word of testimony and chose to give your testimony of joyfully ignoring lies rather than confronting them with the truth please feel free to do so. Any word of testimony that gives glory to our Lord Jesus Christ is worth giving.

You Are Playing With Fire

The title of "My Word of Testimony" is a declaration that what someone else is doing is affecting me. The "someone" or "someones" is a mystery to me. If you are the "one" be assured I only can guess who is doing this.

Romans 12:20 Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head.

Please don't stop.

Oil in My Lamp

My last word of testimony may not seem earth shaking to you but it has had all the effects that an earthquake would have for me.
I grew up on songs like , give me oil in my lamp keep me burning , burning , burning, give me oil in my lamp I pray.
What an odd way to sing about the parable of the 10 virgins. I see it all so differently now.
As I shared with you last time I have come to realize that the oil one needs to have in their lamp is "a right spirit." This right spirit can be lost , just as the five foolish virgins discover.
I think David had lost his right spirit unawares. Fortunately for him the LORD sent Nathan the prophet to prompt him into seeing where he really was. In Psalms 51 he asks the LORD to renew a right spirit within him.
I have been meditating on how to have more of an indication that I might be losing a right spirit. What warning signs can I see to make me more cautious and instead of completely losing my right spirit start doing what would motivate God to renew my right spirit.
Once again I have been reminded how important it is to God that I believe that He loves me.
You know that was the difference between David and Saul . David was convinced that God loved him and Saul just never was sure. Saul was very works oriented I think. It wasn't an obedience based on a confidence of God's love that I see in Saul . I see him trying to earn God's love and always testing God to see if God would love him now.
My transformation of becoming a new creation in Christ Jesus has made me see that I have got to leave my old Saul like attitudes behind.
God loves me and that is settled. He chastens those whom He loves. Only to point them towards repentance. He is glad that I start asking for a gift of repentance and start seeking for Him to answer my request for bread at the door.
So having a full lamp that doesn't drain out through a hole is one that is buoyed by the confidence that God loves me. Foolish virgins may want me to convince them that God loves them but that may be the way one could lose their oil.
I use to think that the reason God wanted me to do things like feed and cloth my enemies, chase down the thief who stole my coat and give him my cloak, and other such things was so others would be convinced by my actions that God loves them.
I had that all wrong. My life is kind of like a dance , that I do with only one partner. He leads me to feed the hungry and he leads me to pray for the sick much like a dance partner leads one in a waltz with fancy steps. I am just following. He is leading. That is all that it is about. He is my God. I am His person . We do things together. I make mistakes , He gives me a nudge to correct my mis-steps. He never stops loving me, He never stops leading me. He is God.

There's a Hole In My .....Lamp.....dear Liza dear Liza

I love allegorical stories and I once asked the Lord if He wouldn't want to give me an allegorical story to write. I have waited on that answer for years. Sometimes wondering if my story would become as famous as Hannah Hurnard's High Feet in High Places. Her story of course has helped millions discover the essential truth in every fruitful Christians life , that our minds are to be renewed with God's word.
She actually may have my subject matter covered because the renewing of our minds is the way we are transformed . My allegorical subject requires transforming and probably is going to amount to a short story suitable , maybe for some Christian magazine that accepts fictitious stories as articles.
I do not want to wait until that day when this would be article is at sometime submitted when I have at my disposal this world wide web and all who want can read it whenever they want.
My word of testimony today is I have an analogy for an allegorical story that I feel will be of great benefit to the Christian community. I am assuming the Christian community has as it's greatest most important concern , being a bride ready for the bridegroom when He comes.
The most important part of being ready for His return would not be doing the right things . It would be doing the right things with the right spirit.
I have found that being made uncomfortable when I have a wrong spirit is a blessing . I once lamented that I was not engulfed with believers who were on constant overflow from the Holy Spirit. However, I now see that in a whole new light.
While it indeed might be wonderful to have your entire being filled day after day with an out pouring of the Holy Spirit. If I had such an opportunity now it would be hard to pass up.
However, I am painfully aware that what I am getting is not being worked into my spirit thus producing for me a right spirit.
What I have is a bucket with a hole in it. As long as I kept going somewhere where there was some overflow my hole in my bucket was not very noticeable. Getting less and less of an opportunity to join with spirit filled believers is making me painfully aware of my lack of love.
Also those addictions that I could joyfully receive grace for , are standing out to me much more.
Yes , I do want an outpouring of the Holy Spirit. Yes, I do want God to create within me a clean heart. Yes, I do want Him to restore a right spirit within me. And I want one thing more. I want to know how to maintain that right spirit so that when He returns , I will be sure to have enough.

Ps 51 : 10 Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

Renew A Right Spirit In Me

The last time I posted I talked about the parable of the 10 virgins. I compared the oil in their lamps to being the empowering of the Holy Spirit and thought it was a warning to those who would burn out before the LORD returns.

Today as I share my word of testimony I have a whole new perspective on this parable. I was close but off quite a lot. Close as in saying Australia and America are close. They are of course on the same planet. The oil in the lamp does have something to do with the Holy Spirit but not at all like I thought.

Close because one can not obtain a right spirit without the Holy Spirit. Off because the LORD is not saying we are to be wise in how we use the Holy Spirit or we will run out.

I think having oil in your lamp when the bridegroom returns it is all about having a right spirit. Foolishly some think that just doing the right things without the right spirit will be enough when the bridegroom comes.

However obtaining a right spirit takes wisdom . Note the parable saying that the foolish virgins realize that they should have bought more. They must have known at some point that a right spirit was required but for some reason did not maintain the required amount for the bridegrooms return.

Note that they actually think it might be possible to be ready when He returns if the other virgins give them some of their oil. That is a little confusing to me still .

I know if I am around others who have a right spirit I do not notice that I have a wrong spirit .

I plan to look into all parts of this parable in the coming days.

My word of testimony is that I was awakened by the Holy Spirit .

Oil In My Lamp

For years the story of the 10 virgins found in Matthew 25 was more than just a story to me.

It was a warning , a red flag that I felt many were missing.

I take everything very seriously so no wonder I'm thinking that having oil in the lamp is a must. I would become impatient at times. Plainly some had no oil. They complained of being worn out while working for the LORD. I would confess my impatience as sin to God and get back into a right spirit and pray for these dear folks. If the joy of the LORD was to be their strength and what we do in our own strength is but dirty rags I had reason to be concerned. However, no reason was good enough that impatience could be considered okay.

Slowly I just stopped worrying about those folks and started concentrating on having my own lamp filled with oil . It seemed like the more I was willing to receive the more the LORD was willing to give.

Just lately I have come to realize the next part of the story. Here refresh your memory and re-read it again.
Matt. 25: 1-13
"Then the kingdom of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom.""Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish. Those who were foolish took their lamps and took no oil with them, but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. But while the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept. And at midnight a cry was heard: ‘Behold, the bridegroom is coming; go out to meet him!’ Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps. And the foolish said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’ But the wise answered, saying, ‘No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.’ And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding; and the door was shut. Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, ‘Lord, Lord, open to us!’ But he answered and said, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, I do not know you.’ Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming."

I have a true story for you and with it I hope that wisdom will come to me , for as you know it is the wise virgins who have a successful happy ending to their story.

Tonight I was reading a book titled The Happy Intercessor by Beni Johnson. The author told of a person seeing the feet of angels as they walked through a building that he had asked the LORD to bless. Years ago I lived in a trailer out behind a truck stop. A lot of acreage sat there unused . I was fortunate to have this trailer lot. There were no close neighbors. Just a pasture behind me that pastured some horses. I came home from church one night and as I looked outside I saw an angel standing there blessing my home. Now I did not know what people would think if I was to say, "oh, look there's an angel blessing my home. " So I didn't say anything. I just thought , "wow, the LORD sent an angel to bless me." My mom and her husband were staying with me then in a little camp trailer they slept in at night. The next morning my mom's husband comes in to eat breakfast and says he has seen the most unusual sight. "Last night" , he says, " I saw a horse that was glowing. It wasn't just the way the moon was shining on it. It would walk around , and it glowed." I thought for a minute , and then an idea came to me. Maybe the story of Moses' face shining after being in the presence of God would have something to do with this. Perhaps the angel that I had seen the night before had something to do with the horse glowing. I did not know but I had a feeling that angel had not stopped blessing when it left my trailer. I just had a feeling it had walked all over that pasture and blessed the whole property.

Within 6 months an unexpected financial blessing came to me and my children and I was able to buy a 2,500 sq. foot home for me and my children to live in. At just the same time all the property , the truck stop and all around me had sold and I would of had to move regardless. A year later there was a hospital in that pasture , a fire station where my trailer had been. The truck stop was replaced with a nice restaurant and connected with a motel.

But you know the hospital did not stay open. The fire station closed. The restaurant closed. I think the motel is still open . Part of the hospital is being used for out patient stuff. I was just curiously thinking I wonder why the LORD wanted me to know that He had sent an angel to bless that property. And now , He seemed to be showing me that it was losing it's blessing. The purpose for the blessing to be a blessing to more and more people , seems to be dwindling. It seems to be able to bless less and less people all the time.

Is it possible that they did not know how to be wise with the blessing that had been given to them?
Is this also why I seem to be running into times when my blessing is dwindling? Can we be frivolous with a blessing? Just sharing it helter skelter and then not have enough oil for the times when we are to really be used the most? Which brings up a good question? Just how does God view my word of testimony if it is just written on a blog no one reads ? I have been trying harder to give my words of testimony personally . When I was faithfully sharing on the blog , my lamp was filling up pretty good. I think just giving a word of testimony must not be the whole picture. Knowing when to give it and to whom may be those things that wisdom would give me. Only I can not really think how I can know , except I can tell you that after I have shared, I sometimes feel drained and not refreshed at all.

Perhaps a clue would be to learn to know , who is waiting expectantly for the bridegroom to come? Some people enjoy being a Christian for the social life it gives them .And then some see it as serious business and are looking for the LORD's return any day. Perhaps those are the ones I ought to stay in company with .

Put It On Jesus

My word of testimony today is inspired by the word of testimony of friends.
I attend this Ladies Bible Study Group that meets every other Sunday afternoon. It was during this meeting that I heard testimonies that encouraged me. I mention this because I think those who read my words of testimony should know that they are not fueled simply by what I seek the Holy Spirit to reveal to me from God's Word. The delightful words of testimony that I hear from others is what keeps me fueled.

In hind sight I wish I had asked everyone in the group, "In what ways have you put things on Jesus?"

My word of testimony: I have learned to want to do the will of my Father in heaven will bring me delight. I have learned to do the will of my Father I must first learn how to put it on Jesus. Carry it to Him , because in my joy and delightful thoughts of pleasing the Father I picked it up and tried to do it myself first. Thankfully that does not have to be the end of the story. As I learn how to put it on Jesus , my joy is complete , while I wait at His feet.

Learning not to try to clean myself up first , before I come to Jesus has been the hardest lesson to learn. I want to be better before I go and ask for His help. I shared with the group that when I went to Jesus during an outburst of anger , He then showed me the truth about what I was thinking. When my thoughts changed about certain situations , those particular events did not provoke anger in me like it had in the past.

This is an ongoing process but sharing this word of testimony encourages me to continue living in God's presence and not take a temporary leave of absence when my emotions seem negative.

Show Me Your Glory

Years ago I was pleasantly surprised when my oldest daughter told me this short story. She was in the middle of a trying time. People were doing things that it seemed had no other purpose but to harm her and hinder her happiness. Yet when she was discussing the events with a friend she said, "I know all things work together for good, so I know eventually some good thing will happen because of these events." As the story goes , her friend had no idea what she could be talking about. All things work together for good was not something that person had ever heard. My daughter said, "Mom, I just could not believe that someone would not know this. You had told us this all the time when we were kids and I thought everyone knows this."

It was true, at every time the car broke down, every event that created what my pastor refers to as "abundant life" as he sees life abundantly filled with hills and valleys, I would say, " I know all things work together for good for them that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose."

I wish now I had said, "show me Your glory , LORD. Show me Your Glory." However, I was close enough to this new phrase that I do not think it will be hard to help my children see how to make the transition. Especially if they will think about the whole scripture and not just the first part.

When I say to the LORD , "show me Your glory," I am actually requesting that He reveal to me my response to the situation that will bring Him glory. Now glory is something also like a light to me. A small birthday candle lit will bring a little light into a dark room. The larger the candle the brighter the light. When I am asking for Him to show me His glory, I am aiming for the biggest brightest light possible. Yet when the day is done and I access how well I lined up with what I felt the Spirit was showing me would bring Him this glory , I feel His joy over any glory , any minute or second that I successfully aimed toward doing His will thus bringing forth His glory .

Peter talked about joy unspeakable and full of glory , and I think I know what he was talking about.

1 Peter 1:6-9
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, whom having not seen you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing, you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, receiving the end of your faith; the salvation of your souls.